Soap for Jesus

Sometimes I think the world has a clearer grasp of right and wrong than we as Christians do, although they try to explain it wrongly. Christians tend to blur up the Bible in an attempt to accept everything they see around them. "Oh, God can't have said. God didn't mean." Well, maybe He did and you just don't want to accept it because you're putting your little code of what you think is right and wrong before His. While our faith is based on historical facts and logical processes, most of the day to day living is a sheer walk of faith. After all, isn't that why it's called our "faith"? Faith like a child. Trusting. Simple. Daddy loves me enough to catch me when I jump. Mommy loves me enough to keep me away from the hot iron and the cars on the road. Faith that while we don't understand and maybe never will understand God's ways or reasoning, He is right and just. Faith means grasping the simplicity of life and leaving the conf...

But as I post that and mean it from the bottom of my heart, that one can never have too many true friends, and one can never have too many messages from them, sometimes physical limitations get in the way. :P I have posted this on my G+ Wall and my blog, and am emailing it out to all my contacts as well. I've just taken on a secretary to deal with my rather large amount of messages/chat notifs/emails. I'd like to introduce you to my dear friend and adoptive sister Emma Alabaster, who will be answering some of the messages that come in to me. I will still be attempting to respond personally as much as possible, but sometimes I can't complete it on the weekend before the working week begins, and if this lapses too long, well. Some of you are waiting for a response after 2 years. Em will be operating on my FB and Gmail (and occasionally to perhaps answer blog comments) ONLY WHEN I HAVE SENT HER a private message stating that I need her to clear something for me. THIS...

I laughed half of the way home. It had been a completely rubbish day. I should've been expecting it after the G+ Hangout OYAN prayer group starting up the night before, but somehow I keep forgetting that Satan attacks whenever we unite in spirit to draw close to the Lord, and usually (for me) in that way. I woke up at 6am to see my Mom off, went back upstairs, set my mobile phone alarm in CASE I fell asleep, sat down and picked my laptop up. Looked up at the clock; 8:30am. I have to leave the house at 7:30 to reach my two connecting buses. OUCH. I begin work at 9, in a city twenty to thirty minutes away by car. ....yeah. I threw clothes on at lightning speed, brushed my teeth in ten seconds, bolted down the stairs, tried to push the dog outside for the toilet but he didn't want to go, grabbed my handbag (Mom had done my lunch the night before), the nearest pair of shoes and my birthday money to buy a ticket with, locked the door and headed for the train station. Mom...

Basically, a couple of thoughts from my much pondering brain. Which is currently on overload. Firstly - I really need to sort things out. My chats are going into disarray; I have to start implementing a system of replying to every chat systematically before replying to one twice. I have to specifically start setting housework time aside, like I'm doing with sibling visits. I also have to set paperwork, letterwriting and cleaning times aside. I'm useless with all of these and they all desperately need improving. Secondly - I've found out a way to literally keep my brain turning over during the dead-pan time of being on the phone for seven hours with no surveys, which fact a) teaches persistent patient cheerfulness to the respondents, b) it shows me my ill attitude at the increase of pressure and irritation at not being free to do what I want to do and c) makes me want to throw my computer and phone out the window. Anyway - the way. :P It's kinda like the word as...

Blubbing seems to be my favourite pastime during services at the moment. God is so loving, so tenderly caring, so very gentle. When we expect condemnation, He tends to show more of His mercy and grace. When we're being arrogant and big-headed and hard-hearted, that's when He tends to break us. Although I admit, you can be broken by love. It's one of the most beautiful things in this world. Last week, Pastor Steve preached on hope. For a girl who'd been struggling a lot the past week and was wrapped in despair...it broke me with love. The main line that I took away from it was: Hope in God when there is none - and He will give you hope. Kristin Dodd, who I met at the Workshop 2012 and tried to reach out to help, has become MY help in so many ways. My little Hope Box, I call her. She drills into me, quite literally, not to despair and "Esperanza" - hope. God is so good... Then this week. There's been financial worry and other worries all week....

When God calls. So many people ask, what will you do with God's call on your life? What will you do when God calls you? Are you waiting for God's call? Pray about it and see what God calls you to do. So much focus on the going forward into the dark unknown... And indeed, wisely. For only a fool would not be careful about a leap into the unknown. Sometimes it is good to take a glance back at where we have come from, and see where grace hath lead us safe this far. It's also good to look back at where others have come - like the hall of faith in Hebrews 11. I want you to read each of these and THINK about each occupation or place where God called them. Really, really think. Take them one by one. Where was Abel when God called? Tending his sheep. Where was Noah? A happy family man, with three sons and settling down into a comfortable old age. Where was Abram, later Abraham? In the land of Ur, with the entirety of his family. Where was Sarai/Sarah? Faithfully...

That time we were all out going around that castle, and we both were trying to photograph each other sneakily, shoving the cameras into each other's faces, laughing. Driving along the road; when it was just us two, you used to let me wind down the window (cause I'd sit in the front of the car) and lean out of the window. I loved that, the breeze and the force taking my breath away. We used to listen to our favourite music that no one else liked - military bands and choral/orchestral pieces. We sang - Here Is Love, We'll Keep a Welcome in the Hillside. You taught me the Welsh National Anthem. You'd surprise me, with sausage rolls, creme eggs, my favourite chocolate bars. One of my favourite things to do with you was for us to come home and we'd have fish and chips and watch a film. When Mommy wasn't there it was a Western. We shared the same sense of humour. Laurel and Hardy, Monty Python. No one shares that with me now. You used to come outside quietly, just to ...

Vents, like most things, can be used for good or ill. They can let out good smells or bad smells. Good thoughts or bad thoughts. Praises or rants or - frustrations. Yet sometimes, the bad product can be turned into good on the way. So here's to hoping the frustration rant turns into a productive praise. If not by posting time, shortly afterwards! As usual, I'm lying back on my bed here looking I'm not doing anything. Which is something that highly annoys me about computers. Or maybe it's just laptops. *pats Lapina* No offence, girl. Sometimes it makes me feel like I'm doing nothing too. Or like I'm wasting time. I mean, I deliberately cut out on things that are time-wasting, like, say, playing Facebook games or watching non-productive films (okay, I do make time for Doctor Who as a de-stresser :P), to take part in more productive things, like chatting to/mentoring people, updating blogs, emails, FB posts, Twitter, website. I'd even like to attempt writing ag...

This is a big topic of small importance... I attended the OYAN Summer Workshop 2011 last year (well, obviously last year). And loved it and everything to pieces. (I think you were still intact when I got home though... *glances at her trident*) I spent two months in the States. 2 weeks in Kansas, 2 weeks in Oklahoma, 1 week in Oregon, 1 week in Texas and 2 more weeks in Kansas. June 15 - August 16. I am not a millionaire and family circumstances were such last year that it is a total miracle that I even got there, much less to travel that extensively. My families took care of me and loved me and God bless them very, very much. Thank you. I fell in love with America while I was there. I'm a passionate British patriot, but I feel two totally different ways about both countries. America and Britain are not perfect - but America is a new land. A beautiful land. A new life. A fresh start. And chock full of my friends and people I love. Long and short of this being, due to my family'...

Posted blogs or video blogs? Both have something going for them. For video blogs, you see a person. You hear their voice, watch their mannerisms, observe their surroundings, recognise emotion, faint at accents, recall memories. It puts pressure on for instant thought, creative speech and expressive body language. In short, it contains a lot more of the physical person in a small confined space of time and image. Written blogs, however, can be long - as long as you like. They require extensive and interesting patterns of thought, creative writing and usage of words to carry the reader through to the end. Painting pictures with words and imagery is completely necessary to carry an idea or a thought that you wish to share. You use eyes and ears and heart to read into what a person is saying through their words. You use fingers to type it out. People feel much freer to express themselves when they aren't visually exposed. In short, writing blogs is supported by the mastery of conversan...

I'm nineteen years old with a fairly unusual past. I have two names and two personalities (no, I'm not schizo). I'm British (half Welsh, 3/8 English and 1/8 Irish with a dash of Scots), redheaded and passionately love my country to being willing to die for her. I love America and Americans dearly to wanting emigrate there. America is "the Promised Land" in spite of its failures, as Britain is "the Land of Hope and Glory" to Americans. I'm independent and very dependent. I'm silent and talkative. I love CCM rock and choral orchestral pieces. I'm crazy about the Royal Air Force, a member/cadet of the Air Training Corps and planning to join later as an officer, but I want to marry and have loads of kids. (As an ex-feminist to a degree, God's done really well on that one!!) I adore military drill, both narrowly watching it done, learning it in depth and performing it with precision. My soul overflows into music and song, both listening to, si...

Okay, I'm going to settle a little problem here, right here and right now. This is to prevent any further talking behind my back. I am busy. Very, very busy. In fact, most nights I'm so busy I'm actually falling asleep online. The other night, I even fell asleep in front of my mother online. Woke up until she went to bed, then fell asleep again until about 2am, when I finally gave up in despair and crawled off to bed. Most days, I get up somewhere around 6:30am and don't stop until 10:30pm. The times that I don't, I'm frantically rushing about online trying to sort out things like emails, and blog posts, and the S4C website. (The only thing I've been wasting time on is watching Dr. Who, and yes, I intersperse that with chatting.) I'm falling asleep a LOT online. I am very tired and constantly on the run. It's not that I don't want to talk. It's not that I'm ignoring you and leaving you in the past. It's that I'm very busy, and I...

There's an app on Facebook called 21 Questions. Recently, I found out someone had answered a question about me. In fact, LOADS of people have! Here are all the fascinating things I discover that people know about me, that I mostly didn't. Wow! Q: Do you think that Siân Garner-Jones is a good driver? A: No. Comment: Minor explosion inside. Although I'm sure that right now, they're pretty accurate. :P Q: Do you think that Siân Garner-Jones has smelly feet? A: No. Comment: Angelic smile beaming forth. I love thee, nice personage. XD Q: Do you think that Siân Garner-Jones is tone deaf? A: No. Comment: Inner radiant glow beams forth upon that person. You're wonderful. YOU LIKE MY SINGING! - maybe. Unless that response was off my siblings, who KNOW I'm not tone deaf and DON'T like my singing! XD Q: Do you think that Siân Garner-Jones spends more than an hour on facebook everyday? A: Yes. Comment: Someone knows me too well. V_V Q: Do you think that Siân Garner-Jone...

Warning: Unsuitable for children under the age of 14. "I am having a lot of difficulty with my feelings about late abortions - and all the pain that's there so much of the time after the baby is moving. So one day, in a need to arrive at a measure of clarity, I went into the room where they keep the fetuses before burning them. They were next to the garbage cans in papers buckets, like the take-home chicken kind. I looked inside the bucket in front of me. There was a small naked person in there, floating in a bloody liquid. He was purple with bruises and his face had the agonised tautness of one forced to die too soon. I then took off the lids of all the buckets and with a pair of forceps lifted each fetus out by an arm or a leg - leaving, as I returned them, an additional bruise on their acid-soaked bodies. Finally, I lifted out a very large fetus and read the label - Mother's name: C. Atkins; Doctor's name: Saul Marcus; Sex of the item: Male; Time of gestation: 24 we...

Written by a 7-8 year old. I found it highly amusing, so thought I'd share it before disposing of the scrap of paper it's written on. 1. Are you a Christian? 2. When were you saved? 3. Are you Amillenial, Pre. or other? 4 Do you believe in evolution, Gap Theory, Millions of years, or other? 5. Will you ever divorce me or go off with other women or have secret affairs? 6. Are you Homosexual? 7 Tell me if you ever get bored of me? 8. Will you "train up your child in the way he should go" so "when he is old he will not depart from it"? 9. Will you buy a big house for Mom + Dad to live in? 10. Will you live here This is completely accurate to how it was written. I'm somewhere between laughter and tears. Some of these are no longer important to me. Some are majorly important and I'm glad they were drilled into me at such a young age. And...some show me too much of the child. ~Jane

Linked to me earlier today by my big brother Jay Lauser . “Who am I?” By Dietrich Bonhoeffer (March 4, 1945) Who am I? They often tell me I would step from my cell’s confinement calmly, cheerfully, firmly, like a squire from his country-house. Who am I? They often tell me I would talk to my warders freely and friendly and clearly, as though it were mine to command. Who am I? They also tell me I would bear the days of misfortune equably, smilingly, proudly, like one accustomed to win. Am I then really all that which other men tell of? Or am I only what I know of myself? restless and longing and sick, like a bird in a cage, struggling for breath, as though hands were compressing my throat, yearning for colours, for flowers, for the voices of birds, thirsting for words of kindness, for neighborliness, trembling in expectation of great events, powerlessly trembling for friends at an infinite distance, weary and empty at praying, at thinking, at making, fa...

1 - Friends to kid around with. Thank you, Adam, for making my day lighter. 2 - Phones and computers to share burdens with. Thank you, everyone, for your thoughts and prayers. 3 - For the sunshine outside. It reminds me God is still on the Throne and loves us enough to send the light in this very dark hour. 4 - For the nearness of the presence of God, even though we cannot feel His hand right now. 5 - Friends that come at a moment's call. Thank you, Brian, for coming after hearing the state we are all in. 6 - The few personal possessions we DO have. The Son of Man had nowhere to lay His head. 7 - Family being near and supportive in thought and action where possible. Thank you to my siblings and my Mom's family for your thoughts, help and prayers. 8 - For America being one week away, and God providing people to be around my Mom while I'm gone. 9 - For the sweet smell of the ground after the rain fall. 10 - Good music and a brother who encouraged me to put "Ever, Ever Af...

So you need a rather rapid update. Recently, my Mom, Jose and myself have moved house. We went beyond the range of the BT Openzone hotspot, so I spent the first night scouring the list of connections. At present, I'm connecting to an open network called TP-LINK. I have two bars of connection, which is better than the BT one, and it breaks less frequently. On June 1st, Mom is having a BT landline installed, which will give us broadband back. God is very gracious. For the next three weeks, my life is going to be intensely busy before I practically disappear offline for two months. I will be taking my laptop and camera with me to the States, so watch out for updates, etc. :D Unfortunately, I won't be able to get a video camera, so you'll have to suffice with piccies. :) I'm trying to sort out the details of my trip at the moment, so when that is finalised as much as can be with the families I'd like to visit, I'll update you. For now, I'm trying to visit Texas,...

I have a slight problem. During my time on the internet, after I started to drift away from OYAN, I became more and more popularly accessible through chat. Now, I love chat. Don't get me wrong. I love all my people that want to talk to me, that choose to talk to me, and that put up with me. I love the variety of conversations, the happy chatter, the many people I can talk to at once. One of the most important things in life to me is my friends. Being there for people, listening and praying for them, trying to encourage them in their walk with the Lord. As far as I'm concerned, one of the greatest reasons the Lord put me on this planet is to bless the lives of others, and I really, really want to do that. Friends are more important to me than a lot of other things, and if I can put something selfish on one side to do that, then I will. But recently, as I get more involved with the blogging side and also with other internet sites, (and my emails), I find the pressure to chat beco...

So I've had a lot of new experiences really, as God changes my life and turns it upside-down, inside-out. I've learned to babysit, day in and day out, moving from a six-month old to five and two year olds. For a girl who wants a goal of thirty children (God and husband willing :P), maybe that's not such a bad thing! I've learned to cope with mildly primitive living conditions, with raw emotions and trying to support other people simply by listening, to dealing with shifts and changes, to eating things I don't like, doing things I don't like. Well, this experience was a new one, and I call it my first in home education - the reproductive system. We'll skip a small part, for while the childish candour had my sister, friends and myself in hysterical laughter, it might not be suitable for younger ears. Jamie (5) holds up the doll that his mom uses to teach her classes. (Toni is a doula, and teaches other women.) Jamie: "This is my baby, Rosie. Why haven...