Soap for Jesus

When I rededicated my life to the Lord in my late teens, I began what seemed to be a lesson a year. First it was love - God began to teach me how to love with His love, to see with His eyes, as I prayed for it. The next year was faith, and the following faith and trust. It wasn't like I picked these to work on - love was what brought me back to Him - a breakthrough from my friend Taylor W. - and faith and trust have always been struggles, partly because I like to understand things, and partly because I've never learnt to trust deeply, easily. Faith, as you know if you live by it, is a walk in trust. The two, though different, are deeply and intimately connected. To walk by faith is to walk in trust, and to trust fully means utter and complete faith. One of the joys of following Jesus has been to see His love through different aspects of my life - as I like to say, "God's love is of the same beauty and diversity as a many faceted diamond." First, I learned His...

It's almost funny, really. I so wanted to write this blog post yesterday, but as much as I tried, it wasn't ready to come. This wasn't the way I dreamed of writing it; slumped in a pool of despondency. But it's now I believe I'm s'posed to try and write it. It's almost funny. But I'm depressed. So it's not. So Lord, do Your best with this. Cause it's not going to be mine. And maybe that's why You wanted me to wait until now. Prayer and Bible reading are meant to be a way of life for a Christian. But they aren't an instantaneous desire, springing up and flowering as soon as you become a Christian. They're called a discipline for a good reason. It's hard to create and maintain a discipline - particularly for disorganised, spontaneous people like me. Recovering from the blow in February through to the beginning of April has taken me until now to start a degree of healing on, but God has been wonderfully sweet and close and started...

Kristin D and I have a unique friendship. It began at OYAN Summer Workshop, 2012, when I looked into her eyes and said the words she's never forgotten. "(God has given me the gift so) I can read eyes." One of the closest sisters and friends I have, we have a special relationship. She's one of those people, the ones that you can bring God smack dab into a conversation without feeling awkward - or where you don't even realise He's in it, but He is. She's been one of the greatest encouragements and lifesavers in my life. God is very much in our friendship. September 13th, several days after one of the greatest sins in my life. I was talking to Kristin. In her words: [3:35:47 PM] Kristin D: Okay I had read Psalm 3... and then musing over it... Something with you had blown up that day... and I was writing about you, and about me... "We're both weak, and both near the edge. I'm asking God for miracles at this point. We're both brok...

Dear guys, blokes, men and gentlemen, This is particularly addressed at you, although it's also a general announcement, because I want you to know where I stand, why I'm off limits and why my Facebook status reads, "It's complicated." Simply because a lot of guys seem to read, "It's complicated" on any girl's status not as a chance to help them out (not me in this case) but as a chance to get a foot in the door. I also want to explain what love means to me - something far beyond mere emotion or fluff, or something that can wither and die. If you've read my blog long enough, you'll know what love is to me. Eternal, unconditional, priceless. True love is God - the heart of God to man. And true love is a gift from God, planted in someone's heart, to never be given up on and thrown away. If God has given you love, then it's nothing to sacrifice lightly. I didn't start this way. When I first fell in love, it was a deliberat...

I'd like to point out a fact. There's parenthood. And there's parents. Parenthood is a God-ordained authority at the head of the family, where husband (leading authority figure) co-joins with wife to provide a supportive guidance network to care for physical, emotional and spiritual needs, requiring implicit trust and obedience when the child is not of an age to make informed decisions for themselves and is still learning about the world. This institution is, as all institutions should be, submitted to Divine guidance and treated with humble fear and trembling by husband and wife, as they (as one) represent the relationship between God as Father and men as His children (when born again). Parents are the people in that institution, and should be fully aware of their responsibilities to the next generation and before Almighty God before ever taking on the role of making babies. While parenthood is a God institution and should be respected as such, some parents trea...

This week has been one of getting lost in God's presence and doing what I love most - reaching out and being there to support, encourage and lift people up in prayer together before the Lord. Next week will be one of doubt, despair, darkness and sadness surrounding, seeping, overpowering from all directions. Question is...will I give in? Will the darkness encompass and take over my soul, or will I let it drive me towards the Rock of Ages? Will I feed on Him and feast in Him and drown myself in Him and continue to struggle on to shine His life and His light out, or will I let go and give way piece by piece on what I believe and/or know to be true, and watch the darkness come in? Darkness always creeps in by the shadows. But light always follows the night. If I say, surely the darkness will overwhelm me, and the light around me will be(come) as night - (why!) even the darkness is not dark to Thee! And the night is as bright as the day! Psalm 139 God is so kind. So gentle...

When God calls. So many people ask, what will you do with God's call on your life? What will you do when God calls you? Are you waiting for God's call? Pray about it and see what God calls you to do. So much focus on the going forward into the dark unknown... And indeed, wisely. For only a fool would not be careful about a leap into the unknown. Sometimes it is good to take a glance back at where we have come from, and see where grace hath lead us safe this far. It's also good to look back at where others have come - like the hall of faith in Hebrews 11. I want you to read each of these and THINK about each occupation or place where God called them. Really, really think. Take them one by one. Where was Abel when God called? Tending his sheep. Where was Noah? A happy family man, with three sons and settling down into a comfortable old age. Where was Abram, later Abraham? In the land of Ur, with the entirety of his family. Where was Sarai/Sarah? Faithfully...

Boys play house. Men build homes. Boys "shack up". Men get married. Boys make babies. Men raise children. A boy won't raise his own children. A man will raise someone else's. Boys invent excuses for failure. Men produce strategies for success. Boys look for someone to take care of them. Men look for someone to take care of. Boys seek popularity. Men demand respect and know how to give it. Boys go with the flow. Men stand out and make a difference - no matter how big or small. Boys want the benefits of adulthood and the freedoms of childhood. Men take on the responsibilities of both. I found this on a picture post on Facebook. And women? What are your thoughts on women vs girls? Can we make another post? :)

Pain at the physical, mental and emotional stages are almost at the highest point that I'm aware of on their gauges. Spiritual level has closed down so much I'm aware of nothing but unvoiced, mere thoughts of prayers and now and then, the presence of God here. It's not lack of sleep and this isn't a stage of exhaustion. Apparently I look half dead - laboured movement, laboured talking, etc. I forced myself to sing at the second song this morning at church; never had to force myself to sing but once before in my life. Singing is my love. The entirety of everything that's bringing this down forced me to one point this morning. I opened my eyes and saw neither one of the addictions I normally run to, but the cross of Christ. At the foot of that cross I am clinging and aware that God's Hands are beneath and upholding me to take the weight. My body is collapsing and my mind is blanking down but if one were to draw a picture of what life currently looks at, there woul...

The parade marshall, Mr. B., and I were good friends. I gave him a Christmas card, and he gave me one in return and also a Christmas present which I still treasure and wear when I'm struggling to remember there are kind people in the world. The Christmas card read something to the point of, "Hoping that this coming year will be as good as 2010 was for you." I remember three months into 2011, half laughing, half crying, I turned to Mom and said, "If anyone sends me a card like that for 2012, I'm going to rip it up, burn it and send the ashes back!" 2010 and 2011 have been two of the most blessed years of my life. I fell into the deepest sins and backsliding; as a result I have seen God's greatest grace extended. I've seen Him reach out and touch a heart of stone into one that's broken and eager for His fulfillment. I've seen the world, I've seen the emptiness, I've been with the lowest of the low, and I've seen the incredi...

A friend and I were chatting this morning about the pink blouse I was wearing. Friend: "Jay would flip if he saw you in that top!" (Yes, I do talk about you guys to offline people :P) Me: *winces* "Yeah..." And my thoughts sail back to the time I spent with the Lauser family and how...simple and innocent and safe it felt. And how something inside looked at their contentedness and ease in their style of clothing, and how I envied it. And also, how their clothing made them stand out as a simple, happy and obvious witness for Christ. Then ensues the conversation about how it wasn't about the amount of skin you showed, but the attitude of the heart, and that we can't really help the clothing that's issued us by today's society... Yeah, that's all right, but there's something more... I by no means dress immodestly, but some of my clothes could call for a higher standard - although I also by no means ever intend to go burqa crazy. But the girl who ...

Okay, I'm going crazy here. :D From my impulsive decision to launch S4C tonight, this afternoon, and sending a scrambled email around to the other team members, to throwing together hastily the advertising suggested by my website creator and manager Kyle Johnston , I've been really nervous all day. For advertising, I've blogged, tweeted, FBed, Buzzed, chat statused and posted on the Rebelution Attic thread and on OYAN's RD thread. Four registrants have joined the forum - a warm welcome to Stephy, Lady_Adrienne, Haitch and Butterfly! God moves in mysterious ways - Attic Moderator (also S4C editor and my big sister) Carissa Mann visited the Attic Greenhouse Thread and she hadn't in ages...found my topic, told me where to edit it and then posted it live. It's starting a startlingly lively discussion on OYAN, too! It's also being reshared out across Buzz, Facebook and Twitter. I'm so thrilled! God is moving and blessing it! Praise the Lord! I'd like to ...

Hello! I've not been an official Rebelutionary that long, but some of you know me... Recently, the Lord laid on my heart that while there are many websites and books out there preparing girls for marriage, there aren't that many dealing with the single years. Not long ago, I saw a post on Facebook where a girl had a dream of helping children and becoming a missionary, but of course, she "couldn't do that until God gave her a husband." So she was going to sit around and do nothing towards what she believed God had called her, because she didn't think she could do it without a husband. I believe in the goals of serving the family at home before marriage, for young women, but a lot of young women seem to think they can't use passions for God before they marry. I think we can. I've been praying for someone to start a website for young single women, to encourage them in God, to support and encourage regular Bible reading and prayer, to discuss Scriptural pr...

One of my most favourite books of all time has to be Elisabeth Elliot's Passion and Purity. Elisabeth Howard Elliot Leitch Gren has to be one of the most inspirational and amazing women out - especially in the guidance area of relationships. The story of her husband, Jim Elliot, is legendary. However, less well known is the love story of Jim and Elisabeth. Embodied in the book Passion and Purity, it contains pain, hope, peace, struggles, tears, timeless God-given love and prayer. It talks about the concepts of releasing back to God, waiting on God, emotional battleground - in fact, pretty much every area that one could struggle with in relationships. This blog post is for Calleigh, Kiehl, Carissa, Rebekah, Anjelica, Kay and Holly, and Miguel, Nick, Matt, Jay and Miles from Passion and Purity. I’m including some of you not because you necessarily have relationship problems, but because you may find some of it a blessing in your own personal lives right now. Chapter 12: Holding Patte...

You know the ink tattoos. Some people like them, some people regard it as too near the real thing to not be almost a sin. I'm not debating, but I do partial compromise. :P On days when I need to remember stuff, I'll use my arm as a piece of paper. It's far less likely (hopefully!) to get lost than paper is! Some things one needs to remember are dates, times, places, to-do items. Other times - it's a simple Biblical truth. If you remember, one of my favourite recent ones has been "Love Endures Everything". For the purposes of this blog, we'll narrow it down and say that there are two kinds of love. Sentimental romantic love, based off feelings and emotional spurts, and true love, based off something much deeper. The first type is what most of today's early marriages are made off, and that is why there are so many divorces. People promise for better or for worse, and when the tough times come and attempt to tear them apart, it's easily done because t...

Pray without ceasing. If any man comes after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross and follow me. He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to save what he cannot lose. In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God, in Christ Jesus, concerning you. I'm waiting on You, Lord, though it is painful. I will serve You while I'm waiting. It was then that He carried you. Give up trying - and watch God do! Let go. Let God. Follow me even as I follow Christ - and never otherwise. I love bends in road. There's something so alluring about them. Expect great things from God, attempt great things for God. Ich Dien (I serve) for His glory alone. He that saves his life shall lose it, but he that loses his life for My Sake shall find it. Never was so much owed by so many, to so few. How much more is the debt that mankind owes - to One? What shall it profit a man, if he gains the whole world, and loses his soul? What will a man give in exchange for his soul? Chosen of Go...

Studying the artwork of Stephen Lauser , looking at the photography of Jacob Lauser and the writing of Matthew Lauser . Time for a bit of promoting! Make sure you click on the links. ;) When I look around me, I'm amazed to watch what God's doing in this generation through inspirational young men and women. Girls who serve their families, reach out to the world through blogs and websites, using their various skills and talents in ways God has given them. Girls like Carissa Mann , with her great editing and organising talents, who balances helping her family with changing other people's lives and her many blogs. Her bright faith, hope and passion reach out and inspire many. The same can be said of Hillary Hipps , Kaitland Conley , Rachel Garner , Grace Garner , Janae Leeke , Rebeka Fry , Anjelica Childs and so many others. Guys like Jay Lauser (okay, I admit the world cannot imitate the achievements of the Lausers - but why not, in other areas?) who has create...

Eleven months ago, I took my first steps outside of my house alone, as I took the dog for a walk around the streets I used to travel with my ex-best friend Gemma, on the start of what would become much-loved and much-sought prayer walks. There's something about walking, walking for a long while, that clears your mind, uplifts your spirit and gives a sense of independence. No other method of transport can do that to you (and if you think about it, walking is the only one God designed us for!). Eleven months ago, I was depressed, broken-hearted, enslaved to several addictions, heavily emotionally dependent on several people and doing anything within my power to flee from and numb myself to emotional pain, even if it meant inflicting more. Within a year, I have gone from walking those streets to taking my first taxi ride, first train rides, first bus ride and first plane flights (subsequently eleven flights!) on my own. :D Within a year, God has brought people into my life who h...