Tears We Shed
Hands cradling a tall, slim mug of hot chocolate, I leaned back in the red leathery chair and stared at the patterned white ceiling.
Music from John Waller - "While I'm Waiting" played low in the background.
I'm waiting, Lord. But peaceful? Oh yeah...painful. And not easy? Boy, that's an understatement. I hate my hurting heart. Still trying to figure out how pain like that can be so bad that it physically hurts.
Raising my left hand, I stared, blank, at the wedding ring on the fourth finger. Using my knees to hold the mug, I twisted the ring, as usual, looking for the join, but it's never there.
Why?
Because it's a perfect circle. No beginning; no ending. It's endless.
Love endures everything.
I'm blinking back more tears as I'm writing this. Apparently it is possible to cry for two days.
This is God's love for us. And this is how we should love one another.
Love is patient.
Love is kind.
Love is not jealous.
Love does not brag.
Love is not arrogant.
Love does not act unbecomingly.
Love does not seek its own.
Love is not provoked.
Love does not take into account a wrong suffered.
Love does not rejoice in unrighteousness.
Love rejoices with the truth
Love bears all things.
Love believes all things.
Love hopes all things.
Love endures all things.
Love never fails.
Why? Because God is. And God is Love.
Love loves enough to let go. Love does not force. And Love waits for eternity.
*cries* (Maybe I'll cry enough that there will be no more tears to shed. *wry smile*)
After that perfectly emotional and heart-hurting post, I figure I'll lighten the mood with what I'm doing "while I'm waiting" for God to move whatever He's moving, lead me wherever He's leading me, and show me what I'm to do with these few (thank God!) years of mortality I have left.
I'm trying to make my own wedding veil. :P
(Not MINE.)
I was bored making calls at work, so I did what I've done before and designed a few random wedding dresses.
Then I figured I may as well design some veils.
Now, I love to sew, but patterns confuse me. So while I wanted to make them, I thought about starting off on a somewhat smaller scale and see what happened.
So I spent £20 at our dear little shop, 'Hole in the Wall', and bought 3 metres of silvery organza, a box of silver beads and grey lace.
Then I finger-wove the headband, which will be attached to a band of elastic,. :D Here it is, in various stages of creation. (Took me over an hour with ten strands!)
IF it works, I'm going to try and sell it on eBay for roughly £50. Profit of £30 wouldn't be bad! :)
Yes, yes. I AM holding one strand in my teeth. :P ^
I've also got a short Christmas story which I may feel undrained enough tonight to scribble down, and share with you over the next couple of days.
But pray to love. And pray for God to change you. When you do, know intense pain is coming your way. But know He does nothing without a reason.
And you WILL be purified.
And you WILL be made like Christ.
Bow your head, and pick up your splinter of the Cross.
No matter the cross.
No matter the confusion when people tell you one thing (like you're wasting your life) and you're hearing another (Him calling you to wait).
No matter the pain. *bites lip*
He is worth it.
~Siân
Music from John Waller - "While I'm Waiting" played low in the background.
I'm waiting, Lord. But peaceful? Oh yeah...painful. And not easy? Boy, that's an understatement. I hate my hurting heart. Still trying to figure out how pain like that can be so bad that it physically hurts.
Raising my left hand, I stared, blank, at the wedding ring on the fourth finger. Using my knees to hold the mug, I twisted the ring, as usual, looking for the join, but it's never there.
Why?
Because it's a perfect circle. No beginning; no ending. It's endless.
Love endures everything.
I'm blinking back more tears as I'm writing this. Apparently it is possible to cry for two days.
This is God's love for us. And this is how we should love one another.
Love is patient.
Love is kind.
Love is not jealous.
Love does not brag.
Love is not arrogant.
Love does not act unbecomingly.
Love does not seek its own.
Love is not provoked.
Love does not take into account a wrong suffered.
Love does not rejoice in unrighteousness.
Love rejoices with the truth
Love bears all things.
Love believes all things.
Love hopes all things.
Love endures all things.
Love never fails.
Why? Because God is. And God is Love.
Love loves enough to let go. Love does not force. And Love waits for eternity.
*cries* (Maybe I'll cry enough that there will be no more tears to shed. *wry smile*)
After that perfectly emotional and heart-hurting post, I figure I'll lighten the mood with what I'm doing "while I'm waiting" for God to move whatever He's moving, lead me wherever He's leading me, and show me what I'm to do with these few (thank God!) years of mortality I have left.
I'm trying to make my own wedding veil. :P
(Not MINE.)
I was bored making calls at work, so I did what I've done before and designed a few random wedding dresses.
Then I figured I may as well design some veils.
Now, I love to sew, but patterns confuse me. So while I wanted to make them, I thought about starting off on a somewhat smaller scale and see what happened.
So I spent £20 at our dear little shop, 'Hole in the Wall', and bought 3 metres of silvery organza, a box of silver beads and grey lace.
Then I finger-wove the headband, which will be attached to a band of elastic,. :D Here it is, in various stages of creation. (Took me over an hour with ten strands!)
IF it works, I'm going to try and sell it on eBay for roughly £50. Profit of £30 wouldn't be bad! :)
Yes, yes. I AM holding one strand in my teeth. :P ^
I've also got a short Christmas story which I may feel undrained enough tonight to scribble down, and share with you over the next couple of days.
But pray to love. And pray for God to change you. When you do, know intense pain is coming your way. But know He does nothing without a reason.
And you WILL be purified.
And you WILL be made like Christ.
Bow your head, and pick up your splinter of the Cross.
No matter the cross.
No matter the confusion when people tell you one thing (like you're wasting your life) and you're hearing another (Him calling you to wait).
No matter the pain. *bites lip*
He is worth it.
~Siân
I can't wait to see the veil when it's done! You will post a pic, right? ;) Pretty please? :D
ReplyDeleteSuch good reminders about love, about God. Thanks, sis!
Loads of love from across the pond!
~Pipsie
*hugs hard* <3
ReplyDeleteI echo Pip - please post picture of veil? :D And if ebay doesn't work, you could try etsy, though setting up a store with them might be more involved than an ebay listing :)
Love you dear!
~Dri