Soap for Jesus

I was thinking about some of the people I've bumped into over the years who struggle with depression, anxiety and/or suicidal tendencies. As I've been going through the counselling process with C., I've also come to realise that while it might trigger the "growing up" bit I missed, and is definitely help me link things together and providing coping techniques to override my body's now-natural patterns of worry, freak out, withdraw, not deal with issues, invert anger and stress until overload, it probably never will cure my depression spells completely. My man tries to reduce all stress levels for me wherever he can and says he thinks it can be healed, but I don't know. Whether it is a "mental illness", (which, while I am coming to accept the term, is one I dislike due to its connotations of limited capability and inferiority) or whether it's some switch tripped by the years on the rough path, as I subconsciously recognise the symptoms o...

Sometimes I think the world has a clearer grasp of right and wrong than we as Christians do, although they try to explain it wrongly. Christians tend to blur up the Bible in an attempt to accept everything they see around them. "Oh, God can't have said. God didn't mean." Well, maybe He did and you just don't want to accept it because you're putting your little code of what you think is right and wrong before His. While our faith is based on historical facts and logical processes, most of the day to day living is a sheer walk of faith. After all, isn't that why it's called our "faith"? Faith like a child. Trusting. Simple. Daddy loves me enough to catch me when I jump. Mommy loves me enough to keep me away from the hot iron and the cars on the road. Faith that while we don't understand and maybe never will understand God's ways or reasoning, He is right and just. Faith means grasping the simplicity of life and leaving the conf...

People have posted and I meant to the night after OYAN ended, but stuff happened. Y'know, like stuff does. And now I'm curled up for half an hour, trying to think exactly how to say the stuff in my heart. Friday night, June 21st, ended OYAN Summer Workshop 2013. I'd gone back to my dorm to put some stuff down before coming back, and missed the prayer over Mr S. As I wandered back around the outskirts of the group praying and singing, eyes closed and tears streaming, Jonny came over to me, pulled me close and wrapped his arms around me. I crumbled against him and started crying. When I finally looked up as the crush of bodies increased, the OYAN people were three deep around me. I was nose to nose with Marybeth, also weeping, with Kristin's expressive chocolate eyes fixed on me with a sad, trembly smile on her lips. This place isn't just any place. This place is our home because we are all there. No, not even that. We could all be there and have no bond...

So I was pretty stoked to write on an issue of waiting on God recently, which was going to be today's blog post. I'm not writing very much this year. :P Oh well, there has been a lot going on! Emotionally, if nothing else. No, you don't get an update on that. Another upcoming post will be focused on marriage to someone with a past, and on a lot of budding relationships recently that have been cut short by either "caring" parents or by the participants themselves because of something to do with the person's past. That's still developing though. :P Tonight an issue cropped up where a friend of mine asked me what I thought on him being married to his girlfriend with a witness before God and outside of a legal wedding. My response was that I'd have to think and pray about it. Still not done on the praying issue yet, but here's some of the thinking - thanks to the 15 voters who chose this post. ;) In an ideal world, church and state would be uni...

Blubbing seems to be my favourite pastime during services at the moment. God is so loving, so tenderly caring, so very gentle. When we expect condemnation, He tends to show more of His mercy and grace. When we're being arrogant and big-headed and hard-hearted, that's when He tends to break us. Although I admit, you can be broken by love. It's one of the most beautiful things in this world. Last week, Pastor Steve preached on hope. For a girl who'd been struggling a lot the past week and was wrapped in despair...it broke me with love. The main line that I took away from it was: Hope in God when there is none - and He will give you hope. Kristin Dodd, who I met at the Workshop 2012 and tried to reach out to help, has become MY help in so many ways. My little Hope Box, I call her. She drills into me, quite literally, not to despair and "Esperanza" - hope. God is so good... Then this week. There's been financial worry and other worries all week....

I was wondering what to post for my 20th birthday blog post. And...I'd like to share this. From my heart again. ;) "Janey, I'd like to ask prayer for healing for your eczema. Would that be okay?" Laura asked, keeping her arm around me. I nodded. "Sure, why not." My family didn't raise me to believe in commanding diseases to leave the body, but I understood that it was done still with the acknowledgement God may not choose to grant it, but the belief that until proved otherwise, He had. Laura caught the main guy's attention and asked him to pray. "Sure!" He moved over to me. Laura had slipped her arms around me again, and my remaining OYAN siblings moved in as a circle around me. "You be the point of contact." He placed his hand on Laura's shoulder and prayed for complete healing of my body. Then he placed on his hand on my head, commanding the eczema to leave my body in the Name of Jesus. What followed next w...

You Never Marry the Right Person Timothy Keller Thursday, 05 January 2012 How our culture misunderstands compatibility. In generations past, there was far less talk about “compatibility” and finding the ideal soul-mate. Today we are looking for someone who accepts us as we are and fulfills our desires, and this creates an unrealistic set of expectations that frustrates both the searchers and the searched for. In John Tierney’s classic humor article “Picky, Picky, Picky” he tries nobly to get us to laugh at the impossible situation our culture has put us in. He recounts many of the reasons his single friends told him they had given up on their recent relationships: “She mispronounced ‘Goethe.’” “How could I take him seriously after seeing The Road Less Traveled on his bookshelf?” “If she would just lose seven pounds.” “Sure, he’s a partner, but it’s not a big firm. And he wears those short black socks.” “Well, it started out great ... beautiful face, great body, nice smile. Everything ...

By John Blake, CNN (CNN) –True love doesn’t wait after all. That’s the implication in the upcoming October issue of an evangelical magazine that claims that young, unmarried Christians are having premarital sex almost as much as their non-Christian peers. The article in Relevant magazine, entitled “(Almost) Everyone’s Doing It,” cited several studies examining the sexual activity of single Christians. One of the biggest surprises was a December 2009 study, conducted by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy, which included information on sexual activity. While the study’s primary report did not explore religion, some additional analysis focusing on sexual activity and religious identification yielded this result: 80 percent of unmarried evangelical young adults (18 to 29) said that they have had sex - slightly less than 88 percent of unmarried adults, according to the teen pregnancy prevention organization. The article highlights what challenges abstinence movem...

It's 10:54 am. Probably be later by the time I finish writing this. Thirty (yes, thirty - I was counting) thirty Peppa Pig episodes later, I carry my finally sleeping (yes, I know, Mr. S, OYANers. Adverbs.) Okay, I'll stop interrupting myself cause it's getting annoying. Thirty Peppa Pig episodes later, I finally carry my sleeping nephew upstairs to his bed and tuck him in, praying desperately under my breath that he will not waken. Today's not been a good day from start to finish...woke up late, accomplished little and what I did accomplish wasn't what I'd particularly aimed to do. People I wanted or hoped to talk to, things either went wrong in the conversation or else, as with tonight because of babysitting, I didn't get online until a few moments before my friend went offline - so we were able to exchange goodbyes. It's also one of those terrible days when I lose words. When I can't really pry deeply into someone's heart or attempt to reach o...

A friend and I were chatting this morning about the pink blouse I was wearing. Friend: "Jay would flip if he saw you in that top!" (Yes, I do talk about you guys to offline people :P) Me: *winces* "Yeah..." And my thoughts sail back to the time I spent with the Lauser family and how...simple and innocent and safe it felt. And how something inside looked at their contentedness and ease in their style of clothing, and how I envied it. And also, how their clothing made them stand out as a simple, happy and obvious witness for Christ. Then ensues the conversation about how it wasn't about the amount of skin you showed, but the attitude of the heart, and that we can't really help the clothing that's issued us by today's society... Yeah, that's all right, but there's something more... I by no means dress immodestly, but some of my clothes could call for a higher standard - although I also by no means ever intend to go burqa crazy. But the girl who ...

Okay, I'm going crazy here. :D From my impulsive decision to launch S4C tonight, this afternoon, and sending a scrambled email around to the other team members, to throwing together hastily the advertising suggested by my website creator and manager Kyle Johnston , I've been really nervous all day. For advertising, I've blogged, tweeted, FBed, Buzzed, chat statused and posted on the Rebelution Attic thread and on OYAN's RD thread. Four registrants have joined the forum - a warm welcome to Stephy, Lady_Adrienne, Haitch and Butterfly! God moves in mysterious ways - Attic Moderator (also S4C editor and my big sister) Carissa Mann visited the Attic Greenhouse Thread and she hadn't in ages...found my topic, told me where to edit it and then posted it live. It's starting a startlingly lively discussion on OYAN, too! It's also being reshared out across Buzz, Facebook and Twitter. I'm so thrilled! God is moving and blessing it! Praise the Lord! I'd like to ...

Hello! I've not been an official Rebelutionary that long, but some of you know me... Recently, the Lord laid on my heart that while there are many websites and books out there preparing girls for marriage, there aren't that many dealing with the single years. Not long ago, I saw a post on Facebook where a girl had a dream of helping children and becoming a missionary, but of course, she "couldn't do that until God gave her a husband." So she was going to sit around and do nothing towards what she believed God had called her, because she didn't think she could do it without a husband. I believe in the goals of serving the family at home before marriage, for young women, but a lot of young women seem to think they can't use passions for God before they marry. I think we can. I've been praying for someone to start a website for young single women, to encourage them in God, to support and encourage regular Bible reading and prayer, to discuss Scriptural pr...

Pray without ceasing. If any man comes after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross and follow me. He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to save what he cannot lose. In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God, in Christ Jesus, concerning you. I'm waiting on You, Lord, though it is painful. I will serve You while I'm waiting. It was then that He carried you. Give up trying - and watch God do! Let go. Let God. Follow me even as I follow Christ - and never otherwise. I love bends in road. There's something so alluring about them. Expect great things from God, attempt great things for God. Ich Dien (I serve) for His glory alone. He that saves his life shall lose it, but he that loses his life for My Sake shall find it. Never was so much owed by so many, to so few. How much more is the debt that mankind owes - to One? What shall it profit a man, if he gains the whole world, and loses his soul? What will a man give in exchange for his soul? Chosen of Go...

Studying the artwork of Stephen Lauser , looking at the photography of Jacob Lauser and the writing of Matthew Lauser . Time for a bit of promoting! Make sure you click on the links. ;) When I look around me, I'm amazed to watch what God's doing in this generation through inspirational young men and women. Girls who serve their families, reach out to the world through blogs and websites, using their various skills and talents in ways God has given them. Girls like Carissa Mann , with her great editing and organising talents, who balances helping her family with changing other people's lives and her many blogs. Her bright faith, hope and passion reach out and inspire many. The same can be said of Hillary Hipps , Kaitland Conley , Rachel Garner , Grace Garner , Janae Leeke , Rebeka Fry , Anjelica Childs and so many others. Guys like Jay Lauser (okay, I admit the world cannot imitate the achievements of the Lausers - but why not, in other areas?) who has create...

Well, here's the first of today's blog posts. :D Here's an email Mom sent me with some random but very good quotes. Enjoy! “When I try, I fail. When I trust, He succeeds.” - Corrie Ten Boom “Great cathedrals and costly houses of worship dazzle our eyes and stir the wonder of the passerby; mighty throngs stream through their aisles every Sabbath; and yet there is a situation that chills the hearts of many of God’s wisest servants. It is a good time to inquire, ‘Where is the Lord God of Elijah?’” - Rev. E. K. Cox, 1929 “One hundred religious persons knit into a unity by careful organization do not constitute a church any more than eleven dead men make a football team.” - A.W. Tozer “We live in a day of itching ears but I have no commission from God to scratch them.” - Leonard Ravenhill “A true love of God must begin with a delight in his holiness.” -Jonathan Edwards “Religion today is not transforming people; rather it is being transformed by th...

Standing at the airport in Houston...okay. Okay, maybe I wasn't standing. I was...dancing. Yep. To "Caramelltanzen" (:P), "Just Haven't Met You Yet" by Michael Buble, then to "Sing, Sing, Sing," "Our God" and "No Chains on Me" by Chris Tomlin. By the third time round of Chris Tomlin, I was very much aware of God's presence around me, to the point of looking around and wondering why no one else could sense it. I noticed a couple of people watching me after a while. I suppose a young woman in two long, loose dresses and a t-shirt with long hair and no make-up dancing publicly was a bit noticeable. :P I used to care, but I try not to any more. Have you ever noticed how restricting caring about people watching you is? You try to blend in. Or else, stand out in a way that fits the mold. Make up. Clothes that aren't too extreme. Moving in the approved way - walking, not skipping, or dancing. As I watched the people aro...

This blog post has been coming for four weeks. During the "message" yesterday, it exploded. Why do we need CCM in the church? It's cause it's the only time that people feel ALIVE! To get some kind of psyche to get feeling towards God, we have to use music to feel alive. Why? The CCM is rarely based on God. It's all based on us and on our feelings towards God. "How lovely is the Lord" is probably the most you get in the first line - then "how my heart longs for and EVEN faints for You." "I love You endlessly." (Like we do...?) How WE feel towards God. Why is there nothing like the wonder of the hymns of 'Love Divine', 'Amazing Grace'? No soul repentence, little adoration of God. It's all spiritual sensuality - because worshipping by feeling is the only way people feel alive. The reason people sleep around so much before marriage? Because in their boring lives, it makes them feel ALIVE. The music does the same ...

My sister Kiehl and I have been learning something about patience recently, as we watched first distant acquaintances, then family friends, then family start courting, get engaged, get married. We're 19, Kiehl and I. She's one day older than me, and my closest girl friend, in a way. And we both struggle with the same problems. And we fall out and make up again. To my mind, we're as good as real sisters with an ocean between us. I love her to bits, even if I can't always find the words to tell her so. Recently, one of our most common struggles has been our single status. And I watch it in a lot of my friends. I'm not quite sure exactly why we want to hit that mark of "marriage material". Maybe because it is recognised by everyone in the Christian circle as a symbol of being "grown up" and "responsible". Which is about the same level as being recognised by the world as old enough to sleep around. I know singleness is hard. I've lived,...

I typed out so long a comment to my sister Samills's post, "My Kind of Modesty" , that I decided to put it into a blog. :) *faint smile* 1 - I understand this type of view too well. 2 - ....how stereotypical of the modern Christian's viewpoint that old ways won't change the world. 3 - How in the world is the world supposed to tell that you're any different if you look, talk and act their fashion? Isn't that called...compromise? Or worse...being a chameleon Christian? W: "So what's your name?" MC: "Ellie." W: "You're pretty cute. You free on Sunday?" MC: "Na, actually I go to church. Free afterwards though." W: "Oh right, you a Christian or something?" MC: "Yeah." *slight pause* MC: "Say, you know the latest song out? I think it really hits the mark." Umm. Okay. Before I'm judged (for being judgmental, pardon me). That might not be exactly the kind of conversation, but I'm...

Ignoring combats*, which I hate because 1- they aren’t smart and 2 – they are army clothes, there is one piece of my uniform which I hate. Not with a passion, as I do camos*, but I really don’t like my RAF jumper. It’s one of the biggest ones on the Squadron, about four sizes too big, with a neck that gapes around my collarbone, sleeves that need to be doubled up, and a hem that also has to be tucked under as it reaches to my knees. It’s a good, thick blue grey wool, with a pocket on the sleeve for a pen as well as having the blue-grey shoulder patches with epaulettes for brassard and rank slides/flight tapes. In the icy blasts of winter, it provides a wonderful warmth. But for all of its serviceable self, most 196 girls – definitely myself, any rate, and my mother – hate our jumpers. Why? Because they literally hang like feed sacks. They don’t give a hint of a shape or a figure, and when you’re used to walking round in a smart blue shirt with sleeves rolled up, a belt around your ...